Why Most People Are Not Persuasive
A Simple Strategy To Get People To Actually Listen To You
Why Most People Are Not Persuasive
A Simple Strategy To Get People To Actually Listen To You
Written by a human, for humans, always.
Most people believe they are brilliant...
Worth listening to...
Able to provide so much...
To others...
Maybe even the world.
Yet...
When they actually begin to speak with others...
Especially those they are trying to convince otherwise...
They fail.
They do not land with others.
Except, maybe, those who already agree with them.
But that does not really move the needle.
It completely fails to make any form of progress...
Only designing an echo chamber that results in nothing changing for the better.
So...
Why is it that most people are not persuasive?
The answer is...
They do not actually know who they are speaking to.
Not really.
So many people have a preconceived idea of who they are communicating with...
And that is why they fail.
They try to be persuasive...
Not to the real human being they face...
But to the caricature they have designed in their mind.
The result...
Is that the person they are trying to persuade...
Knows that the person speaking at them...
Does not know them...
And likely...
Is not actually interested in getting to know them.
The result...
Is that no one listens.
You completely fail to be persuasive.
Here’s the reality...
No one will ever listen to you...
Unless they believe you are willing to both listen to and understand them.
If you fail on either of these...
You will never...
Ever...
Be persuasive.
It is really that simple.
I see so many people in the world today...
Who think that they are making a dent in the world because they put something into the world...
But really...
They are not accomplishing anything of note because they do not understand those they are trying to persuade.
Their efforts are all absolutely in vain.
Some of those individuals...
Put a “lot” of work into accomplishing nothing.
Every single day...
Making new types of content...
Trying to convince others to listen to them...
All failing.
In fact...
Many of these individuals are not just failing to be persuasive...
But their caricatures of who they believe they are talking to is so off base...
That they are actually pushing away people who used to be their allies.
Yes, it is possible to be so poor at this...
That you become dissuasive.
Creating new enemies where there were none before.
So if you do not want this to happen...
There is a really simple strategy you can utilize to help you become more persuasive...
Get to know who you are trying to persuade.
Not in theory.
Not based on what you hear.
Not according to those who disagree with them.
Get to know the real human beings.
What they are hoping for.
What they are afraid of.
What they like and dislike.
How they are living in their real lives.
What is impacting them and their community.
What values they have.
I have found that it is so rare today for people to take any real amount of time to learn about others.
They are so consumed with themselves...
Their problems.
Their beliefs.
Their values.
Their fears.
That they completely ignore all other people in the world...
This ends up...
Usually unintentionally...
Pushing everyone else away.
This is not how relationships are formed.
How communities are built.
How the world is improved.
These types of things only occur when we begin to work together...
In unity...
Actively seeking to understand each other.
If you earnestly and honestly seek to understand others...
You will become more persuasive...
Because you will begin to actually know what will speak to them...
Not through words alone...
But into their soul.
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