Pathologizing Normal
The Challenge Of Identity And Limitations In Our Society
Pathologizing Normal
The Challenge Of Identity And Limitations In Our Society
Written by a human, for humans, always.
When I was young...
I had a few different challenges.
A speech impediment.
Difficulty writing due to being naturally ambidextrous.
Reading challenges.
On top of that...
I was considered “Borderline ADD/ADHD”.
What does that mean?
Essentially...
My mom had the option to have me medicated...
To have me formally diagnosed...
That I was on the border “enough” that I “could” be formally diagnosed...
Or I could be left undiagnosed, and we would see where I ended up over time.
My mother’s decision...
Was to leave me undiagnosed.
And I’m really thankful for that...
Because here is the thing...
This was right around the time when ADD/ADHD began to be “diagnosed” in a larger segment of the population...
When the qualifications began to expand and loosen.
More and more often...
People with fewer difficulties than I...
Were being regularly diagnosed.
Over time...
I was able to figure out how to work through (mostly) all of my challenges.
Able to write legibly (though it is not pretty).
Eventually moved into advanced reading courses (though I still read slowly).
And today, I do public speaking (though sometimes I still get a little tongue-tied as the speech impediment occasionally makes a surprise appearance, a great opportunity to get the audience to laugh and feel more comfortable).
Importantly...
I have learned how to work around focus to keep myself going in the direction I want in life...
And it seems to be going pretty well so far, given the state of my education and career.
But so many people...
Who had significantly fewer struggles than I did...
Who were fully diagnosed as the criteria loosened...
Ended up struggling significantly worse than I.
Now, some may argue that the drugs given to many children end up causing more problems than anything...
That is not a conversation that I am trying to have at this time.
What I want to get at is something more psychological in nature...
That of identity and limitations.
See...
When most people are diagnosed with something...
Such as ADD/ADHD...
They will say something like...
“I am ADD/ADHD”.
What is that?
It is a statement of identity...
I am something.
This is what happens with most diagnoses.
We, as humans, begin to identify “as” the diagnosis.
What does this do to us?
For many people...
It can bring a sense of gratitude...
An explanation for the challenges they face in life...
But at the same time...
It can easily become the “reason” for where they are in life...
A limitation.
But this is where it becomes important to us now...
Is the diagnosis a real limitation?
Or is it creating a glass ceiling that we “could” break through...
But never end up attempting “because” we identify as the diagnosis?
I am not saying that there are not “real” diagnoses that exist and “substantial” challenges that people face...
I live with my 40-year-old brother-in-law, who was diagnosed with non-verbal autism when he was young, with real challenges he has to face daily.
What I am getting at...
Is whether the challenges we face...
Are truly factors of something diagnosed...
Or undiagnosed in some cases (which you should “always” get an official diagnosis from a good healthcare professional if you believe you should be)...
Or...
If the limitations we have in our lives...
Are more surmountable than we realize.
See...
There are many people who believe they have challenges...
And as diagnosis criteria have loosened, more healthcare professionals who end up diagnosing...
But should we really be so ready to diagnose?
Or...
Are we starting to pathologize normal?
See...
If we begin to “overdiagnose” what is “relatively” normal...
We run a risk of people over-identifying with their diagnosis...
And failing to live up to their potential...
Not because it is not possible...
But because they “believe” that their diagnosis limits what they are capable of.
How many people...
Are living small lives...
Simply because they do not know...
That they are capable of more.
What makes it even worse...
Is that by “saying” this...
I could easily be accused of not being empathetic to their challenges.
But it is quite the opposite...
I am not denying they have challenges...
Rather, I feel horrible for them because they are absolutely capable of overcoming those challenges...
Yet may never even attempt it...
Because they so deeply identify with their diagnosis...
That they do not even truly try.
They give up before they learn how to work with their challenges or around their challenges.
They get frustrated because they believe they are trapped...
When the truth is that they are far more capable than they realize.
That their limitations are shadows upon a piece of paper...
That they could easily tear through...
If they sincerely tried...
Not to the extent that they believe their diagnosis limits them to...
But to the extent that they are actually capable of.
See...
A large part of the reason that I have come so far in my life...
Is because my mother challenged me...
Pushed me...
Not to accept the limitations that I faced...
But to push through them...
To rise higher.
She taught me to not give up...
To not give in...
To get back up...
To try again...
To adapt and change tactics if necessary...
Until I figured out how to do it in my own way and move forward.
I still write with my right hand with a left-handed hook (Because my right mirrored my left being ambidextrous)...
I still have difficulty sitting still and reading fully through things...
I still stumble in my speech and have to refocus my mouth to enunciate correctly...
But these challenges do not stop me.
I consistently read scientific research and doctoral-level textbooks in my work...
I get on stages and speak my messages to others...
I have written and published 1,200+ daily articles...
I have been recognized at levels most people only dream of...
Not because I am anything special...
But because I never identified with my challenges...
And figured out how to overcome my limitations.
There are people out there who have significantly fewer challenges than I...
Who are not living up to their potential...
Not because they are truly unable...
But because we have pathologized normal in our society...
Have identified as their diagnoses...
Been told by people they trust that these will prevent them from more...
And they have accepted limitations that do not really exist.
Perhaps...
We should stop pathologizing what is actually normal...
Stop accepting limitations and work through challenges, even if it is unorthodox...
Stop identifying as whatever diagnoses are given...
And rise into something greater.
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So, what can we do around these challenges?
What is within our power?
That is what we will look at next.
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