I'm Just Tired
Being Blunt And Honest In An Overly Performative World
I’m Just Tired
Being Blunt And Honest In An Overly Performative World
Written by a human, for humans, always.
I have been writing every single day...
Meaning I put myself at the computer...
Think of what I want to write about...
Write...
Edit...
And Publish...
Every single day for over 1,275 days.
And today...
I’m just tired.
Not tired of writing.
The more I do it, the more I fall in love with it...
Even on the difficult days.
But today I’m really tired.
It’s been a long day.
Not everything went as I would have hoped.
You know...
The life challenges that we all have or run into at some point.
Challenges with different platforms needed for my work.
Vehical challenges.
Taking care of things that have to get done.
Not all good things...
But I can be grateful that I’m alive and continuing forward.
Now...
I finally have the opportunity to sit down to write...
And my brain feels fried.
Just a hovering cloud...
With what feels like the dust of Mr. Sandman falling down like snow.
(For those who do not know, Mr. Sandman is the mythical figure that “brings dreams” to people by putting sand in their eyes, with the evidence of his passage can be found in the morning if you have eye crusties, aka his sand!)
Look...
I know we live in this world where people are expected to perform all the time...
In whatever medium(s) they dedicate themselves to...
But I am not here to be a puppet to a social media overlord...
And I am not going to be a picture picture performer for any audience...
If you do not like it...
That’s fine.
You can go chase the next person in the awful rat-racer toward burnout, anxiety, and depression.
That is not how I choose to live my life.
Sometimes...
I reserve the right to say in my work...
That I really do not care what you want me to talk about, discuss, or explain.
Come back tomorrow after I’ve gotten a bit of sleep.
Just because I’m tired and have no motivation today...
Does not mean I will not tomorrow.
Who knows except God.
But for now...
I’m just tired.
I’m human and I’m not going to attempt to convince you otherwise.
I have no need to live by the world’s rules and expectations.
I have my own goals that I am working toward...
And quite frankly...
I’m doing better than I ever imagined was possible.
Blessed is the only way for me to describe it.
So today...
I’m going to rest a bit.
Rant a bit about the insane standards our society has developed.
Be irritated that I still cannot get into one of the platforms that I like to publish to after 48 hours.
Just be human for a bit.
Have we all forgotten what that is like?
I mean...
Obviously we all know it because we all try to hide it like it is something that we should be embarrased of...
But why?
Why are we so ready and willing to try to cover up the fact...
That we are human?
When did it become such a bad thing?
Do we have problems?
Of course.
Lord knows that I do for certain.
But last I checked...
Being human...
Even in all of its messiness...
Is one of the most incredible things that one can be.
Yet we treat it...
Like it is a curse...
A stain...
An ugly birthmark that we must keep covered.
I’m not going to perform like that.
I already know you’re human and that whatever you’re trying to hide is making you feel like a failure or imposter inside.
It does not make it true...
I have my failings and humanness and still move forward despite the standards that others attempt to force upon me.
You should too.
Here’s the reality...
I’m tired...
And you may be too...
And that is human.
That is normal.
You should not beat yourself up for that.
You may need to take some time...
And just tend to your own humanness.
It is alright to do that.
You do not need permission...
And if people try to fault you for being human...
Realize they are trying to force you into a standard that not a single human can ever meet...
And to do so will kill you...
Emotionally...
Mentally...
Spiritually...
And may even kill you physically.
Maybe it is ok...
To just talk about being human...
To admit we are tired of these ridiculous standards...
And to stop trying to meet them.
Look...
I have no intention to stop writing about Sageship, Leadership, Psychophysiology, Holistic Health, and Regenerative Legacy Design...
Plus the many topics around these different topics...
But today...
I’m just going to be human...
Admit that I’m tired...
And say that...
This...
Is good enough for today.
To Your Sageship,
Cody
P.S. - It can be Difficult to Figure Out How To Achieve…
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